10.21.2006

veinte questions

Uno: Mr. Vats of Glue, why are there rats in your mouth?
Dos: Mr. Leveraged Buyout, why do I hear muffled screams in the trunk of your limo?
Tres: Mr. Redundant, why do you sit in a corner and cry, your sobs echoing off the walls?
Cuatro: Mrs. Tampon, why do you flit like a hummingbird in the kitchen while you cook?
Cinco: Reverend Butthole, where can I find a good deal on tires?
Seis: Dr. Rancid Milk, why do you lie dead in a pool of blood?
Siete: Mr. Question, do you ever look in a mirror and burst into fits of insane laughter?
Ocho: Mrs. Wilted Lettuce, why did you slit the throat of poor Dr. Rancid Milk?
Nueve: Judge Leadfoot, why do you sleep while justice dies a slow, painful death?
Diez: Senator Urine, how much did your leather shoes cost the peasants of Guatemala?
Once: Señor Vanquished Peasant Village, why do you heave mirrors at black cats as they scurry past?
Doce: Miss Unhappy Childhood, why do you miss your childhood?
Trece: Mr. Gargantuan Tooth Gap, why do you insist on calling chocolate pudding "chocopud"?
Catorce: Professor Leaf Rake, how do you maintain such a positive demeanor?
Quince: Mrs. Chainsaw, why has no one seen Mr. Chainsaw in four months?
Diez y Seis: Mr. Garden Hose, what are you sawing and nailing at night while the town sleeps?
Diez y Siete: Reverend Pie in the Sky, could you please share your recipe for cheese surprise?
Diez y Ocho: General Yowza Yowza, as you scan the horizon, do you notice the clouds gathering buckets of rain?
Diez y Nueve: Doctor Three Eyebrows, if two dogs run toward each other at two hundred miles per hour and collide head on, will the resulting force as they strike weld the animals together, resulting in one dog?
Veinte: Mr. Bags of Blue Paper, why do you go from door to door selling religion to hung over roofers and road workers?

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